You can't fix stupid, althoughnature has a way of eliminating it

h/t McGillicutty

The Mean Drunk

A woman goes to the doctor all black and blue and they have this conversation:

Doctor: "What happened?"

Woman: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp."

Doctor: "I have a real good remedy for that. When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of sweet tea and start swishing it in your mouth but don't swallow. Just keep swishing and swishing until he goes to bed in his stupor."

Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn.

Woman: "Doctor, that was a brilliant idea. Every time my husband came home drunk, I swished with sweet tea. I swished and swished,and he didn't touch me!"

Doctor: "You see how much keeping your mouth shut helps?"


h/t Theodore

Wise County Newsflash!

The Wise County Messenger Update website has been hacked by "Tiger-M@te" a self described "Bangladeshi Hacker". Our local paper has just risen to a new level of importance on the world stage!!! See for yourself...

I wish I said that...

Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young.

A.W. Pinero