Saturday, September 5, 2009

U.S.Gov Releases
New Dollar Coins

REFUSE IT!

Received this email today.

This simple action will make a strong statement. Please help do this...

Refuse to accept these when they are handed to you.

I received one as change yesterday and I asked for a dollar bill instead.

The lady just smiled and said 'way to go' , so she had read this e -mail.

Please help out....our world is in enough trouble without this too!

You guessed it
'IN GOD WE TRUST' IS GONE!

If ever there was a reason to boycott something, THIS IS IT!

DO NOT ACCEPT THE NEW DOLLAR COINS AS CHANGE

Together we can force them out of circulation...

Pop term of the day:
shoulder tapping

shoulder tapping

using the services of a person over 21 to buy alcohol for minors

Hey man, I lost my fake ID so I gues tonigt we've got to do some shoulder tapping.

Of Interest

Adolph Hitler's speeches translated into Engish on video! Absolutely fascinating!

Top 10 Ways To Grab A Woman’s Attention… Insightful!

You might be an a$$hole if

50 most brutal college football hits on video

Friday, September 4, 2009

This captured my attention!

Hitler's speeches translated to
English. Just 9 minutes worth...

Absolutely fascinating!

Email of the day!

We are worried about "the cow" when
it is all about the "Ice Cream".

The most eye-opening civics lesson I ever had was while teaching third grade this year. The presidential election was heating up and some of the children showed an interest. I decided we would have an election for a class president. We would choose our nominees. They would make a campaign speech and the class would vote.

To simplify the process, candidates were nominated by other class members. We discussed what kinds of characteristics these students should have. We got many nominations and from those, Jamie and Olivia were picked to run for the top spot.

The class had done a great job in their selections. Both candidates were good kids. I thought Jamie might have an advantage because he got lots of parental support. I had never seen Olivia's mother.

The day arrived when they were to make their speeches. Jamie went first. He had specific ideas about how to make our class a better place. He ended by promising to do his very best. Everyone applauded and he sat down.

Now is was Olivia's turn to speak. Her speech was concise. She said, "If you will vote for me, I will
give you ice cream." She sat down. The class went wild.
"Yes! Yes! We want ice cream."

She surely would say more. She did not have to. A discussion followed. How did she plan to pay for the ice cream? She wasn't sure. Would her parents buy it or would the class pay for it. She didn't know. The class really didn't care. All they were thinking about was ice cream.

Jamie was forgotten. Olivia won by a landslide.

Every time Bar@ck 0bama opened his mouth he offered ice cream and 52 percent of the people reacted like nine year olds. They want ice cream. The other 48 percent know they're going to have to feed the cow and clean up the mess."

Remember, the government cannot give anything to anyone --- that they have not first taken away from someone else.

h/t Texas JLH

Unnecessary Humor

{Politicians in America} < Adequate



Communist flag to fly at Whitehouse this month. Do you think he will put his hand over his heart and pledge allegiance since we've already pledged our assets?

WARNING: Do not fight a liberal! They bite!

Time magazine infers Florida’s government destroying Florida? No way!

How do you enforce a health-insurance mandate? The IRS has the answer!

Pharmaceutical company settles out of court lawsuit for a record breaking $2.3 billion to US government! Who pays? In business, it’s always the consumer! Now tell me again why medicine is so expensive...

THE ICING ON THE CAKE: Senator Harry Reid wants to promote tourism by introducing the ”Travel Promotion Act of 2009”. Funding will come mainly from a $10 fee extracted from visitors as soon as they get off the airplane!
What better way to promote tourism than to tax visitors? Actually, I see an upside. More revenue should be collected by taxing upon entry instead of exit since we don't force them to leave! Give 'em tax in hell Harry!

Pop term of the day: latchkey wife

latchkey wife

Based on the phrase "latchkey kid." A wife who comes home from work to an empty house, left to her own defenses during the evening, while husband works opposite shift.

Because of her time alone, the latchkey wife was free to have complete control over the remote control and the computer with no interruptions!

Unban Dictionary

Of Interest

Fair & Balanced photo

WOMEN are the biggest cheats, they’re just better at lying about it!

Streaker may have hurt his head… kinda ballsy if you ask me…

I thought I had seen it all until I checked out the bounce-o-meter…

Even bears don’t fight fair

Thursday, September 3, 2009

New survey, please vote...

Recently I was made aware that some people do not appreciate the photographs of the scantily clad "hawt" women as much as others. Now I knew this would happen, but the people who have mentioned are those whose opinions are worthy of my ear.

In my tweens, when I would go to my grandmother's house, I would always sit down and check out the latest issue of Cosmopolitan & McCall's magazine to get my fix of eye candy. Cosmo had extremely risque photos as well as explicit sexual articles, which led me to believe that it was cool to read and appreciate this type of material.

I am very selective of the women I choose to post. These women are either high profile, models, celebrities; otherwise, they fit in to a story or are used for humor. All must pass very stringent evalutation! I do not post pics of women from the book, "I Wanna Be A Ho".

So, please be honest when you vote. There's no one looking over your shoulder so you don't have to take the high road. Also, there's no reason to be hypocrital either. I appreciate brutal honesty!

I have noticed that when my subjects get VERY serious and scary, comments fall way off... Good looking women have a way of brightening a man's day; make him feel like a man, not a mouse...but as always...

I could be wrong,

Denney Crane

Email of the week

How to spend your stimulus check.

Sometime this year, we taxpayers may again receive an Economic Stimulus payment.

This is a very exciting program. I will explain it using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q.. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China
* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs
* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India
* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras and Guatemala
* If you buy a car, it will go to Japan
* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan
* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore
Instead, keep the money in America by:
1 spending it at yard sales
2 going to ball games
3 spending it on prostitutes
4 beer
5 tattoos
These are the only American businesses still operating in the US.

*** I'm going to go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that I met at a yard sale and drink beer! Yay!

h/t Billy

Politically correct?
Only when Democrats
are in power...


How does a politician get away with blaming California wildfires on global warming? You label them a liberal and wonder why they didn't blame it on Bush!

How do you set a good example for students? Serve alcohol to them at the ball…

Nationalized health care helping doctors assist speeding the death of the terminally ill.

Whitehouse sued over collecting “fishy” email collection. Now rerouting them to another site.

0bama’s green jobs czars blames “white polluters” for steering poison into minority communities… but have no fear, 0bamacare is near!

Pop term of the day: amscray

amscray


Pig latin for "scram," which means "leave."
(Mom and Dad are having sex when Little Johnny walks in)

Johnny: Hi Mom! Hi Dad!
Dad: WTF?! AMSCRAY!


I already knew this one.... how old school. The Three Stooges taught me this one many years ago.


Unban Dictionary

Of Interest

Tori Praver and her awesome gallery

This is quite possibly the ugliest purebred dog in the history of ever!

Useful Twitter Tips… Can you say that 5 times fast??? I actually found this useful…

Cougar Convention 2009 in pictures and I’m not talking about the 4 legged animal either; it’s more tame!

If you’re like me, you want to at least know some sign language… especially the dirty ones!

Signs that your girlfriend may be a psycho I knew it! Cat ownership is one sign! I do disagree with #1, but 4 out of 5 isn't bad!

How a stranger might try to shut a 2 year old up in Walmart. He’s lucky it wasn’t my kid! I would probably go to jail as well...

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Only if you need to smile...

otherwise, you might want to
pass on this one. I needed it!
Warning: obscene language


Politicians want to scan you
for your medical information...
and anything else they
"deem necessary" to help you!


Did anyone tell you about the info starting on page 1004 in the health care bill, where it mentions a class II “implantable” data device? Is this the mark we must take? h/t Bob Parks

0bama White House Has Secret Plan To Harvest Personal Data From Social Networking Websites

Why is the media silent about 0bama slashing $1.4 billion from Medicare to heart and cancer doctors? No death panel needed, just let them die from non-treatment!

Abusing School Kids With Pro-0bama Propaganda ? You make the call!

Health Care For America Now organizer instructs supporters on how to shout down opponents. Just remember who started it...

Pop term of the day:
Joke Insurance

Joke Insurance

When two mates have a mutual understanding to laugh at each others jokes, no matter how lame or awkward said joke is, therefore lessening the social failure of the bad joke.

I was talking to some girls the other day when I cracked a 'your mother' joke. Luckily, I had joke insurance with Chris so I still ended up getting both their numbers. All Chris got was a weird look for his over-the-top laugh.

Unban Dictionary

Of Interest

When a woman wears a leather shirtdress, a man's heart beats quicker, his throat gets dry, he goes weak in the knees, and he begins to think irrationally. Ever wonder why?
It's because she smells like a new truck!

Too hot to handle… Top 12 Maxim Cover Shoots

Finally a useful demonstration on how to avoid check fraud.

Do not get between a hungry actor and his pizza, even while shooting a commercial!

Do you remember when I asked you what’s the grossest video you’ve ever seen? Here’s another…

Now these are what I call real vanity plates!

Do you think this hurt like hell or did shock save him from the pain?

You might want to be very careful about what you say on Twitter and Facebook… these people weren’t!

10 Most Hated People on Facebook

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Spoken like a true uneducated
backwoods Wise County redneck


* Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong.

* Keep skunks and bankers at a distance.

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John Deere tractor..

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered...not yelled.

* Meanness don't jes' happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than you.

* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

* Every path has a few puddles.

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain't never gonna happen anyway.

* Don't judge folks by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you'll enjoy it a second time.

* Don't interfere with somethin' that ain't bothering you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the success of a rain dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

* The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every morning.

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* Good judgment comes from experience... and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

* Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back in.

* If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

* Live simply, love generously, care deeply, and speak kindly. Leave the rest to God.

**Don't pick a fight with an old man. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.

The Good Old Days,
Before Martial Law


Have we “…moved into the period of the Great Tribulation and soon the horrors beyond anything man has seen or done in all history will be our final lesson.”

If [with our borders it should read “when”] terrorists strike U.S. Cities with nuclear weapons, our nation will never be the same. Borders will close, detention camps will open, and 'America' will be a thing of the past.

“Tax protesters, demonstrators against government military intervention outside U.S. borders, and people who maintain weapons in their homes are also targets. Operation Trojan Horse is a program designed to learn the identity of potential opponents to martial law.” If you want to ask your government about it, here’s what you get. Here is one reason your Congressman can’t answer the question.

Did you know our military went around confiscating guns in New Orleans during Hurricane Katrina? Our government believes the biggest problem during catastrophe is the American people . They send in the clergy to disarm you first!

Oh, you want to go help fellow Americans or defend your rights? Sorry, you have to get through military checkpoints first.

If you would like to sift through a page of links on martial law and America, here’s a good place to start.
If you would like to read some interesting articles from non-alarmists, let me give you a few links:
Here are some facts that you don’t know about FEMA

Could Terrorism Result In A Constitutional Dictator?

If you knew me personally, you would know I am not a paranoid alarmist. I am a fairly intelligent, reasonable, charitable patriot. I will continue to pray for America, Americans, Christians and all those who are to endure immeasurable suffering. I ask you to pray as well. Compassion has never been a trait I lack. If you have ever prayed for the knowledge of His will in your life and the power to carry it out, now would be a very good time to start.

I accept the fact that this post will draw personally attacks, but I am led to post it anyway. God Bless You!

humbly awaiting re-education camp,

Denney Crane

Political positioning!


Bob Dole says, Health-care reform is the No. 1 domestic priority. **
Clueless idiot liberal? What about unemployment? There are millions of Americans wondering about how they will provide food, clothing and shelter for themselves and their family! Why do people continue to want government control over Americans? I can't wrap my head around it!
Adding insult to injury, H.R. 3200 would provide affordable, quality health care for all Americans and reduce the growth in health care spending. Cost for average family, $12,180Reduce growth? Cost? Does that sound affordable to you? I see absolutely no savings, just more government involvement!

Did you know Texas is enacting more than 600 new laws on September 1, 2009? Here are a few .

Administration Announces Not Enforcing Union Reporting Laws **



** h/t Bob Parks

Pop term of the day:
Burning Envy

Burning Envy

The expirience often felt by persons not going to Burning Man beacuse they have real life obligations such as jobs, school, kids, etc.

Mike: Coming to Burning Man this year?
Nate: No, I have school and other shit I need to do.
Mike: So what! You can always start school a week late!
Nate: No, no I can't just blow off all my obligations to party in the desert with a bunch of freaky druggies and rich douche bags who try to be freaky druggies once a year. Reality is more important right now.
Mike: You should still come.
Nate: You just don't get it do you?
Mike: You have Burning Envy, HA HA!
Nate: ...


Unban Dictionary

Of Interest

Hometown hottie Stevie


Finalists for Maxim’s 2009 Hometown Hotties

Holy Spirit? ~ Exit question: You guys realize that this clip is pure heroin to atheists, right?

Moments in history… Funniest Moments in “The Price Is Right”.

More moments in history… Funniest Stage Wipeouts Of All Time

8 Celebrity Chicks that Might Have…ur, Penises



#1 Country Music Hit of 2009?

Monday, August 31, 2009

Free Your Mind, The Rest
Will Be Borrowed From China

Economic Illiterates Trivilizing
Socialized Medicine And Spouting
Abject Nonsense On Youtube

PWNED
Once again, facts just confuse liberals illiterates!

Unnecessary Humor

Stolen Car

A drunk walks out of a bar with a key in his hand and he is stumbling back and forth.

A cop on the beat sees him and approaches, "Can I help you Sir?"

"Yessh! Ssssomebody ssstole my carrr,"
the man replies.

The cop asks, "Where was your car the last time you saw it?"

"It wasss on the end of thisshh key,"
the man replies.

About that time the cop looks down and sees the man's wiener hanging out of his fly for all the world to see. He asks the man, "Sir are you aware that you are exposing yourself?"

Momentarily confused, the drunk looks down at his crotch and without missing a beat, blurts out... "Holy shit! My girlfriend's gone, too!!"

About the time I think
I know the end of the story

Very old school humor...

Pop term of the day: immaturation

immaturation

the process of becoming immature

by revisiting old posts we were able to witness the immaturation of the internet from a place of cordial dissent to whiny bickering.

Of Interest


Tombstones that make you grin

If you believe all birds are stupid, then you are very unfamiliar with the crow…

What not to do with fire.

Scandal is a career killer for many celebrities. Very few have the ability and clout to have a story killed as do Barbie, until now

iPhone apps inappropriate?


h/t Crappie Raider

Sunday, August 30, 2009

50 year old "ISM" warning

The modern world they talk about!

Pop term of the day: mascary

mascary

when a person wears a scary amount of mascara

Although Melanie thought her mascara application was flawless, her eyelashes really looked like scary spiderlegs


Unban Dictionary

Differing Interests

Martial arts excellence...


What NOT to
do with fire...

Fax communication...

To: YOU
Date: TODAY
From: GOD
Subject: YOURSELF
Reference: LIFE
This is God. Today I will be handling all of your problems for you. I do Not need your help. So, have a nice day. I love you.

P.S. And, remember.. If life happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do Not attempt to resolve it yourself! Kindly put it in the SFGTD (something for God to do) box. I will get to it in MY TIME. All situations will be resolved, but in My time, not yours.

Once the matter is placed into the box, do not hold onto it by worrying about it. Instead, focus on all the wonderful things that are present in your life now.

God